![]() ![]() That was certainly the case for me at 18, in nineteen ninety one. We’re more familiar with anorexia and bulimia. I think that sometimes people don’t know what binge eating is. So at that time, I was I was a freshman, I was 18 years old, and my life was organized around binge eating and had been at that point for a couple years. ![]() Tell me about your relationship to food at that time. So if you don’t mind starting with something so hard. And like, what a strange moment, I imagine, to realize that there was some kind of hidden story going on under the surface about young women who seem to have it all together and their hungers. When you started undergrad at Yale, you noticed that the bathrooms were locked during lunch. This is a story that in some ways has a beginning at Yale. K.B.: Oh, well, right now, just for you, I’m wearing my Yale sweatshirt. I’m so glad to be here because I likewise have been having the same feeling about you. And I feel like we obviously then share the same brain. ![]() So I think what you’ll hear today is about how we struggle against our hungers and oh, geez, do we need compassion for that. #KATE BURTON HOW TO#We have to keep knowing how to love them as they change. Issues with our bodies are not ones we overcome because our bodies are, you know, living things. Today is a tender conversation because it’s not a victory story. I know a lot of people will relate to the all consuming fears and desires that she’ll be talking about today. It’s a book about a secret and how this secret threatened to swallow up all the beautiful parts of her life that she had planned on keeping. And she has a gorgeous new memoir called Empty. Susan is an editor at This American Life, and her writing has appeared in the New York Times magazine, Slate and The New Yorker. Her name is Susan Burton and she is lovely and fancy. My guest today knows a lot about shame as she realized she was trapped in an eating disorder that had very little popular awareness, a problem with no good name. Shame is quite certain that we are stuck forever. Shame whispers, you should do more and you’re nothing until you finally, finally get over this. Shame keeps us trapped in the lie that no one will understand and that it will never get better. Our unsolved problem becomes the breeding ground for a different kind of separation. That reason for the estrangement that keeps us from picking up the phone. The addiction that has slowly crept its way back into our lives. The affair, the lump we’ve been trying to ignore, but we know it’s probably not nothing. Kate Bowler: There are some secrets we’d rather not tell, but that eat us alive. We can find beauty and meaning and truth, but there’s no cure to being human. And it’s OK that life isn’t always better. But I’m here to look into your gorgeous eyes and say, hey, there are some things you can fix and some things you can’t. Keep this attitude and the money is yours. Believe with your whole heart and God will provide. ![]() Lose this weight and you’ll never be lonely. The self-help and wellness industry will try to tell you that you can always fix your life. Then I was diagnosed with stage four cancer. I’m a Duke professor, wine and cheese enthusiast, wife and mom. I used to have my own delusion of living my best life now. We’re not always having the juicing spree of our lives. But this is a podcast for when you want to stop feeling guilty that you’re not living your best life now. Look, the world loves us when we are good, better, best. Kate Bowler: Hi, I’m Kate Bowler, and this is Everything Happens. ![]()
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